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Post by Eric Stormborn on Nov 8, 2015 3:17:54 GMT
Eric had been enjoying the sex right up until Ariel had walked in on him and James, instant guilt filled him as he saw the look in her eyes. A part of him knew it had been inevitable, but he had hoped that he and James could have kept on going a little bit longer. "Wait James-" He shouted as his lover took off after Ariel after pulling on his pants, he himself was in the middle of pulling his pants on as he heard them move off towards their room. He ran a hand through his hair and sighed, he sighed and sat back down on the bed as his body slowly came down from the pleasure he hadn't fulfilled. A curse left him as he stood up and grabbed a beer bottle from it's cabinet in the room, he usually didn't drink as the taste wasn't something he particularly enjoyed. Tonight however, he had a feeling he'd need the numbness that drinking gave him if Ariel were somehow able to forgive James then he Eric would be left out of the equation for good. He should have felt angry at everything going on, but instead he felt resigned...he never should have encouraged James to be with him. Now because of him, James was probably going to lose the real love of his life, as much as Eric would have wanted to have been that person he knew that James hadn't felt the same as he did.
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Apr 30, 2016 19:54:33 GMT
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Post by James Frollo on Nov 8, 2015 4:24:31 GMT
James made his way to back to Eric's house. Hours ago he had run out and followed Ariel all the way back to his house. He still couldn't believe what had happened but he couldn't think of that right now. James stumbled into the guest room, the door shifting open to reveal his body in the doorway. He glanced at Eric before he made his way in and slammed the door shut behind him, not even caring if he awoke any of the servants. James made his way over to the cabinet and pulled out a bottle of scotch, slamming the lid down on the table as he drank directly from the bottle. The alcohol burned as it made it's way down his throat but he didn't care. Ever since he and Ariel had gotten together, his drinking problem had almost completely faded away, but tonight he needed it. He kept the bottle clutched in his hand as he made his way over to the chairs by the fireplace where Eric sat. His body collapsed into the chair across from his friend but he didn't say a word, trying to decide how to say what he needed to say. He sloshed the liquid around in it's bottle, watching as it folded over itself over and over again before lifting his gaze up to Eric, staring at him with a blank expression. "Looks like we need to talk..."
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Post by Eric Stormborn on Nov 8, 2015 4:35:14 GMT
Eric let out a bitter laugh, "Yeah I think so too...and to be honest I'm fine if you leave." That last word came out in a near silent whisper. He finished off the bottle in his hand, having already gone through most of it while James had been gone. "I take it you and Ariel moved out?" He asked after a long pause as he got up and grabbed another bottle from the cabinet. He could understand Ariel's reasons for wanting to leave, in fact he could respect her decision hell if it had been him he might have reacted much worse. His eyes flicked up to look over at James and frowned as he saw how awful he looked, "How did it go?" He asked quietly as he opened the bottle before he took a long drink.
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Apr 30, 2016 19:54:33 GMT
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Post by James Frollo on Nov 8, 2015 4:46:13 GMT
James took another gulp from the bottle as he stared into the fire. "She won't speak to me. I got her to stay but she can't even look at me." Pain showed through his voice and he groaned, running a hand over his face. "Damn it Eric, I never should have let any of this happen." He leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees as he spoke. If he had never given in to his desires, none of this would have happened. He wouldn't have to hurt Eric like this and Ariel would never have seen him how he was. The cuts still showed on James' wrists where Daemon had sealed his animal side but he ignored the pain that it caused him. He didn't know what had happened back there. Whenever he tried to think about it, all his brain would show him was darkness. Daemon wasn't very helpful either but at least now he knew that Ariel was safe. Safe from him. "I'll have all of our stuff out by the morning..." He took another drink, taking in the last of the scotch until the bottle was empty and he simply tossed it lightly on the ground. The bottle didn't shatter as it hit the carpet thankfully and it rolled away from him.
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Post by Eric Stormborn on Nov 8, 2015 4:58:51 GMT
Eric frowned as he saw the cuts on James's wrist, "What is that?" He asked, a low protective sounding growl coming from him as he moved to take James's hand in his own. His eyes narrowed as he took in the marks, "You had someone seal off your powers? Are you crazy?" He released James's hand as he studied James with disbelief. "Do you have any idea how dangerous that is? No wait better question, what possessed you to want to remove something that's a part of you?" He asked as he stared at James silently demanding an answer. He ran a hand down his face as he tried not to get too angry and failing miserably, "What happened after Ariel came in? Gods....I should have-" He broke off and paced in front of the fire feeling angry tears well up in his vision.
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Apr 30, 2016 19:54:33 GMT
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Post by James Frollo on Nov 8, 2015 5:16:07 GMT
James pulled his hands back when Eric tried to look at them and pulled the sleeves of his shirt down until they covered his scars. He kept his gaze down to the ground as Eric questioned him, knowing that it really was a stupid idea but it had to be done. If Daemon hadn't sealed him when he did, James could have killed Ariel and he couldn't live with that. "Look, I had to. I almost killed her tonight Eric, what was I supposed to do?" His gaze flicked up to his as an anger slowly welled up in his chest. "I attacked her....I don't know what happened. I blacked out and when I came back, she was covered in blood...my hands...covered in her blood." His voice faded out as he stared down at his hands. Every muscle in his body was tense as he thought about the events. "Something inside of me took over and I had no control...That angel sealed it off before I could hurt her anymore..." He buried his face in his hands as he spoke, the urge to have another drink taking over him.
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Post by Eric Stormborn on Nov 8, 2015 5:25:00 GMT
Eric's body tensed as he listened to James talk and glanced down, "Why didn't you tell me you were having trouble with your control? I know someone who could have helped...damn it James I could have helped!" He said as he threw his beer bottle against the wall not caring that it shattered. He leaned over and gripped James's shoulder with one hand as he knelt so he was eye level with him, "You can't go back and change what happened with Ariel, but turning off your powers like that...it's not natural. It's fucking painful and I'm sure I don't need to tell you that." He said as he studied James with concern. Now that he was looking directly at him, he could all but sense the pain from James and all he wanted to do was to take that pain from him and bear it himself. "How long have you been having trouble with your control James?" He asked quietly as he rested one hand on James's knee in a comforting gesture.
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Apr 30, 2016 19:54:33 GMT
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Post by James Frollo on Nov 8, 2015 5:39:47 GMT
James winced as the bottle sailed across the room and crashed into the wall, shattering to pieces. He knew Eric would be upset that he hadn't told him about the trouble he had been having but he never expected him to react this way. He kept his gaze away from Eric when he knelt down next to him and tried to look in his eyes. "You don't think I know that? My body feels like it's on fire but I have to deal with it." He pushed Eric's hand off of his knee and slid off of the chair, his shoulder nudging Eric's as he stood up and paced away from him. "I've been handling it fine by myself until tonight. It's just when I get angry, I lose control.." He ran his hand through his hair and spun around to look at him. "I didn't tell you because I though I could handle it. It doesn't matter how long it's been. Now I have a chance to fix this." He shoved his hands into his pockets as he felt a stabbing pain in his head. Now that he was getting angry all over again, he could feel the animal part of him trying to claw it's way out but Daemon's seal held it at bay. Why did he have to get attacked that night? If he and his father never got into that argument, he never would have been in the woods and had his life changed. He was getting sick of being a supernatural and all he wanted in that moment was to be a normal human being again.
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Post by Eric Stormborn on Nov 8, 2015 5:48:39 GMT
Eric felt his heart go out to James as he admitted how painful it was, "I'm not happy that you didn't tell me what was going on. I know you thought you had it under control, but I am centuries older then you and I would have been more then happy to help you out. I hope you know that." He said as he turned to stand up and face James, "So it gives you pain every time you start getting angry?" He asked as he watched James run a hand through his hair in a motion that seemed agitated, "Fix it? So simply because some guy went in there and turned off your angry switch, you think that's going to make things better? What if that switch gets turned back on and you lose control again? I'm not saying you will because you are one of the best men I know. I'm just worried that you're going to rely on that switch to save you from making a mistake...and I don't want to see you get hurt. I know what happened with Ariel wasn't your fault...you lost control and your animal side took over...not you. My first form is being an animal James...I know better then anyone what it feels like to hurt someone you love." He said flatly his voice coming out a little broken. "But locking that part away and not treating it? That's not a good idea, believe me I know." He added with a little shake of his head.
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Apr 30, 2016 19:54:33 GMT
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Post by James Frollo on Nov 8, 2015 15:12:47 GMT
James grit his teeth at Eric's words. "What did you expect me to do Eric? I hurt the woman I love. I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I had..." His words were a whisper until they faded out, not able to say the words he was thinking. If he had killed Ariel, James surely would have taken him own life in grief. "If I have to, I'll leave it contained forever. I can handle this pain if it's to keep her safe." He listened as Eric spoke, immediately getting the feeling that he had lost someone in his early stages. He knew that Eric never like to talk too much about his past, and maybe that was why but if he had lost someone, then he would understand why he did what he did. James went to the cabinet to get another drink, pulling out a beer this time since he already drank all of the scotch. He glanced at Eric over his shoulder and frowned. "Then if anything, you know why I did it. If I can figure out how to handle it then I'll try to live with it free once again but until then..." He saw the look Eric was giving him and frowned. "Don't look at me like that..."
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Post by Eric Stormborn on Nov 8, 2015 18:52:32 GMT
Eric sighed, "I know exactly what it would feel like James....I've killed one of the few people who I had real feelings for. It was shortly after I learned how to shape shift, at that time there were two men I really liked. One of them is still alive but the other one....the other one I killed. One minute we were talking, and then he said something. I wasn't even aware I had shifted until suddenly I became aware that I was squeezing him to death and there was blood all over me. I had torn into him without even being aware of it...I panicked and shifted back, but it was too late. He was dead and I had killed him, after that I looked for the person who had taught me how to shape shift. He was able to take away my powers for a time but it was at a price. I realized later on after I got my powers back that I hadn't learned anything! My instincts were so ingrained in me that removing them for a time didn't stop them from being there. I hurt someone....and I barely managed not to kill him. He wasn't angry at me...but I was...so I decided to remove myself from the human world for a time. I needed to figure things out, I needed to control my animal instincts while in human form. It was a very long process, mostly because I wasn't human. I kept trying though, I didn't want to keep hurting anyone. So I learned mediation, which while it may seem stupid was honestly the one thing that really helped me. I learned how to channel all my pent up rage into positive emotions. It wasn't easy...in fact it was the hardest transition as I had a lot of slip up's." Eric moved to sit down on the armchair that James had vacated as he stared into the fire with a thoughtful look. "I still sometimes do...If you should learn anything from tonight....learn from my mistakes. You may have lost control tonight but you didn't kill her...maybe that was because of the angel. You're not a killer James, you're too good." He said with a small smile as he glanced over at James. "Keeping it locked away forever....that won't solve anything. If anything you'll grow to resent Ariel for making you keep it under lock and key. Do you really want that to happen? Every person has to deal with their inner demons at some point. I mean, it would be nice to just pretend our powers don't exist right? But that's not a solution either, sooner or later you'll have to find some kind of balance. When you lock them away for long periods of time....it does something to you. It makes you wake up in the middle of the night...believing that you're still a monster. Even when logically you know that can't be true, it makes you wish you had all your powers back. Sometimes, it feels like you even have them....but then reality hits and you realize that no...you lost them. The worst, is wanting to have your powers back...when you're at that stage, you're willing to do whatever it takes to feel that freedom that comes with your abilities. The rush that it gives you...the feeling of being stronger then anyone else. That's what I'm really worried about James...you deserve better then to have your abilities locked away. Controlling them, is much easier then forcing them away from you." He said quietly.
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Post by James Frollo on Nov 8, 2015 19:23:10 GMT
James took a drink before moving to sit in the chair across from Eric, listening to every word that he said. He had never expected to hear that his past was so dark, but that's what happens when you've lived for centuries he guessed. Though James hadn't killed Ariel tonight, he could understand how the man felt. Killing someone you loved is always devastating, regardless the circumstances. "I'm just sick of this. So much has changed since I was turned and I don't think I can handle it anymore. After this...." he sighed and ran his fingers through his hair. "I just want to be human again." He didn't look at Eric, knowing he was going to scold him for saying it, but it was true. He was sick of hiding and being different. If he was still human, his father never would have started the proclamation and everything would be normal. His father never would have lost it and raped his fiancee and his life would be better. Though the more he thought about it, the more he realized what had happened to him over the past months. He met Ariel because of what he is and now she was the love of his life. That was something he would never regret.
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Post by Eric Stormborn on Nov 8, 2015 19:32:13 GMT
Eric sighed, "Is being human that important to you?" He asked after a long pause. He didn't like hearing the words but it would ultimately be James's decision. He couldn't push him into doing something he wasn't willing to do. "If you really want your powers to be gone...I know someone who could take them for you." He said quietly, "But you and I can never see each other again, if you're sure of your decision then I'll pay the price. You've already been through enough tonight and I can pay the price better then you." It was a lie, but Eric was willing to do whatever it took to make his former lover happy....even if it cost him his life. He stood up and grabbed a shirt from the closet that he pulled on.
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Post by James Frollo on Nov 9, 2015 4:23:03 GMT
"You know I couldn't let you do that Eric, I'm fine, I can deal with this..." James sighed and looked over at him. He didn't want Eric to pay any price for him, especially knowing that if it made him human, the price would be huge. But maybe if he could have Eric's friend at least help him with this. "I can't be human again, I know the price would be too much, but maybe if they could help me tone this power down or something. That way I don't have to be sealed...and I don't have to lose you." He lowered his gaze and wrung his hands together, trying to decide if he should even bother with this.
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Post by Eric Stormborn on Nov 9, 2015 4:41:36 GMT
Eric sighed, "James...after tonight and what happened with Ariel, I don't know if we can keep doing this. I don't want to come between the two of you and I feel like I have...you mean the world to me. But I also know that Ariel loves you and seeing how she reacted...if it were me and I saw someone I was married to with another person I would have reacted violently. This probably isn't the right time to say it but I love you James...I always have, and I can't keep lying to you or me about what I feel. Although I haven't exactly hidden how I've felt towards you, and I know you don't love me...I was just the man lucky enough to be yours for a time. Being with you...has given me the most joy I've ever had in centuries." He said with a little laugh as he looked away from James. "I'm sorry for laying this on you on top of everything else you're already dealing with." He said with a frown.
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